Around these parts you can easily find strip clubs if that'll do the trick. In Mpls, that is (I still don't even know if it's possible to change your username, so I have to keep reminding everyone I'm Minneapolisite now). Hell, there's a shabby one within short walking distance from my apartment.
In Columbus, well, you have to go to the suburban parts of the city up north for the fancy ones (Kahoots) and the trashy ones (House of Babes) are out on the south and west sides of town. Actually, the west side saw just about all of them close: Rumors was shut down for prostitution, the new Misty's Showbar lasted maybe only a handful of months (heard that place was trouble) and so I think that leaves The Candy Store, which conveniently has a yummy taco truck out front that does in fact also sell sweets in the form of homemade ice cream, so in case it was actually candy you were wanting you can get your fix. Though, I'm puzzled as to what would make the strip-club patrons so hungry for tacos.