2020 - Air Your Grievances

[swimmer_spe]

My year has actually been going well. I got married, did a cross Canada honeymoon and will be buying my forever home on a lake.

2020 may have sucked for everyone else, bu for me, it has been a good year.

[SignalHillHiker]

Sorry to hear about everyone’s struggles. I’m rooting for us all

And congrats, Swimmer! It’s hopeful to know things are going great still somewhere.

[Nashe]

I too, haven't had it nearly as badly as some. My sympathies to those affected directly or indirectly. Losing a job in this environment would be pretty brutal.

The first two months of the year were very status quo... looking forward to a vacation in March that we booked last fall. When we took off for it "covid" was just a rumor with a couple of cases in an obscure province in China.

Then, less than a week later, we start getting the dribs of drabs of the world going nuts while the staff around us on the cruise ship are doing their best to keep everyone calm. Climax was getting turned away from the port we were supposed to disembark at; got re-routed to Canaveral two days away. Shuffled through US border controls as fast as possible like cattle and put on 80 busses for Orlando airport. The airport was a virtual ghost-town. Managed to get home within two days and hard-quarantined for 2 weeks.

Spent the next few months scrambling to get hundreds of users remote access to our work infrastructure via half a dozen different technologies. Our church has been 100% virtual since the end of March. The Atlantic bubble gave us a bit of a respite a few months later... then further relaxings... things are "almost" back to normal now, save the masks.

Everyone is holding their breath about the shoe-dropping now that kids are back at school... we'll see...

My employment has been stable. Arranged some flexibility for my tenants. Delayed a couple of mortgage payments early on. Wife was basically laid off and is only now getting hired back slowly. A definite bump in the road, but not to the degree it has been for many. I don't personally KNOW anyone who has gotten COVID... the headlines are just of people "up north" or "in ICU for a few days" here that get released, eventually. It's a bit of a Bogeyman, effectively... though a real one.

My only real GRIPE isn't really 2020-related, though it's amplified it: Social Media misinformation. Makes me gag. Zero fact checking by anyone. Blind shares and forwards. The silver lining might be that it's at least turned a lens onto the utter ignorant insanity that is out there, behind closed doors.

[niwell]

Very sorry to hear about some of the struggles people have been having here, and hope that whatever measures you have taken to address them are working. I know it can be tough!

Sometimes I feel kinda bad that I fall into the camp where things have been pretty good, all told. My wife and I had our honeymoon in Hawaii just a few weeks before the shit hit the fan, which was incredibly lucky. Early COVID wasn't great, but the transition to WFH was fairly easy for both of us, and looks like it will continue for the foreseeable future. If anything I may have gotten outside more than usual during this time just to go for multiple walks during the day so I didn't feel cooped up in the house. We moved in July to a bigger place to make the work situation easier - it wasn't ideal staring at each other from across the house and unlike the Ontario government, my wife's company is very good at handing out money to help set up home office space!

We are also extremely lucky to have a relatively small tight-knit social group that doesn't have older relatives (or any relatives, really) living locally. Two of our best friends lived above us at our old place and we were having backyard beers as soon as it was warm enough to stand being outside, which expanded to larger "distanced" hangouts into the spring. Once things opened up a bit we've gone to a fair number of patios and had one nice meal out. Managed to spend a week in Prince Edward County with our friend bubble and also a smaller trip to Muskoka - not my preferred level of travel but was quite fun and VERY much easier on the bank account.

I would say the biggest negative for me really is less contact with my more peripheral social group. I have some friends who are extremely cautious for any number of reasons and have not seen nearly as much of them. With relaxed restrictions on businesses and summer weather we finally did get to meet up again outside, but I am worried that come winter it may have to go back to zoom chats. Speaking of which, I HATE zoom chats. It was nice catching up with some people you rarely talk to for a little bit but got over that fast. As for the rest of the clusterfuck the world is going through, well, I was feeling pretty blackpilled before all of this so while I certainly have my own strong opinions and views on things it really doesn't affect my life in person that much (for better or worse I guess).

I'm interested to see what winter will bring, but again, extremely glad I have a close group of people that will hang out inside since we don't really have close contact with anyone else.

[MolsonExport]

congrats to Niwell and swimmer_spe on their marriages!


Niwell, did you honeymoon in Maui? That was where I honeymooned with my wife in May-June 2005 (also where my son was conceived....no rest for the wicked, apparently).

[niwell]

Originally Posted by MolsonExport

congrats to Niwell and swimmer_spe on their marriages!


Niwell, did you honeymoon in Maui? That was where I honeymooned with my wife in May-June 2005 (also where my son was conceived....no rest for the wicked, apparently).

Thanks!!! Hawaii likely wouldn't have been our first choice since we aren't usually that kind of traveler, but my uncle-in-law owns a condo in Kauai. We were gifted airfare and a week's stay there which was incredible! Decided to make a bigger trip of it and stayed 3 days in Honolulu, 3 in Maui followed by 8 in Kauai. In Maui we stayed right in Paia but did the drive to Hana and around the island (extremely harrowing) and took a local bus out to Lahaina for an afternoon. No children as a result of this trip haha.

The whole state is very interesting and didn't feel like the "mainland" US at all, really. I'd highly recommend Kauai as it felt slightly less touristy and was a bit less expensive than Maui which resulted in some frightening credit card bills! The scenery ranges from rain forest to what acts as a stand-in for the grand canyon in the west. Honolulu is a big city so fun for going out to neat bars and restaurants plus got my history fill in (solo) at Pearl Harbor. It also has a much rougher edge than you may think given the preponderance of tourism.

[MolsonExport]

Originally Posted by niwell

Thanks!!! Hawaii likely wouldn't have been our first choice since we aren't usually that kind of traveler, but my uncle-in-law owns a condo in Kauai. We were gifted airfare and a week's stay there which was incredible! Decided to make a bigger trip of it and stayed 3 days in Honolulu, 3 in Maui followed by 8 in Kauai. In Maui we stayed right in Paia but did the drive to Hana and around the island (extremely harrowing) and took a local bus out to Lahaina for an afternoon. No children as a result of this trip haha.

The whole state is very interesting and didn't feel like the "mainland" US at all, really. I'd highly recommend Kauai as it felt slightly less touristy and was a bit less expensive than Maui which resulted in some frightening credit card bills! The scenery ranges from rain forest to what acts as a stand-in for the grand canyon in the west. Honolulu is a big city so fun for going out to neat bars and restaurants plus got my history fill in (solo) at Pearl Harbor. It also has a much rougher edge than you may think given the preponderance of tourism.

Good stuff. I have visited Oahu on previous occasions (I know Honolulu well, and I much prefer the north and Windward coast of Oahu to Waikiki) and I spent 9 days on the the Big Island on another trip (saw everything, went everywhere). We spent 13 days in Maui for our honeymoon (Based in a Ka'anapoli beach hotel), and we did everything that there is to do there (Haleakala at dawn, road to Hana, every beach, Iwo needle, tons of snorkeling [we got very lucky and swam with about 100 spinner dolphins for a couple of hours], Molokini, etc., etc.) I have also been to Lanai, but not to Kauai...which is at the top of my list. We are planning another Hawaii trip, but this time with the kids. I hope to combine it with an academic conference (there are usually 1-2 every year somewhere in Hawaii that are strongly connected to my primary research stream).

[SignalHillHiker]

Congrats, Newell! Great to hear.

Originally Posted by giallo

This year has been really tough on me as well. Moving to a new city and country mere months before COVID hit does not bode well for one's social life. I've never been so socially isolated in my entire life. As a full on extrovert, it's slowly, but surely started to mess with my mental health. I've had to try really hard to keep it together some days. With the added stress of not being able to work in Korea (I was working in China via Korea before the borders got shut), worrying about one of my parents that's very much at risk, my cat dying and not really liking the city I'm in, it's been a "death by a thousand cuts" situation.

I feel like a douche whining about it, because there are so many more people worse off than me, but it is what it is. I need social connections for the sake of my sanity.

Not douchey at all. That sounds brutal. Being in a city you don’t like is the absolute worst, at least in my personal experience. I’ve never been as mentally unwell as when that was my circumstance. In fact, first time in my life I was genuinely depressed - and only recognized it as such in hindsight because I’d never experienced anything close to that before. And even now it’s not as bad as it was when I was out west.

It’s interesting what we’re learning about ourselves through this. I thought I was an ambivert - love getting together with friends, generally people like me in social settings, but definitely needed my alone time. One of those “The hardest part of making new friends is I don’t want them” people. Now I realize I’m definitely more extroverted than I thought.

[esquire]

Originally Posted by niwell

Hawaii likely wouldn't have been our first choice since we aren't usually that kind of traveler,

What kind of traveler do you mean?

[niwell]

Originally Posted by esquire

What kind of traveler do you mean?

Hang out at the resort / beach type, though obviously Hawaii does have a lot more to offer than that! We usually travel to various cities for a short period of time which involves excessive amounts of exploring, food and drink (not necessarily in that order) on foot and/or public transit.

[esquire]

Originally Posted by niwell

Hang out at the resort / beach type, though obviously Hawaii does have a lot more to offer than that! We usually travel to various cities for a short period of time which involves excessive amounts of exploring, food and drink (not necessarily in that order) on foot and/or public transit.

That's why I asked... in my experience, Hawaii is far from the all inclusive, sit on the beach type of destination. I guess it can be if you want, but I mean, so could Chicago if one just wants to sit on the beach all day.

[HomeInMyShoes]

Originally Posted by davee930

I don't know why everyone is complaining about 2020. Name one thing that is bad right now. I think everything is pretty damn good!

Compare 2020 to 2019 where Brexit just kept dragging on. Talk about a nightmare year.

The US Election. Talk about dragging on and destroying everything.

[HomeInMyShoes]

Overall, it hasn't been crazy terrible, but losing parts of the school year for the kids sucked big time. My kids learn better with teachers, not parents. Although I can get my son doing math better than his teacher.

[swimmer_spe]

Originally Posted by SignalHillHiker

Sorry to hear about everyone’s struggles. I’m rooting for us all

And congrats, Swimmer! It’s hopeful to know things are going great still somewhere.

Originally Posted by MolsonExport

congrats to Niwell and swimmer_spe on their marriages!


Niwell, did you honeymoon in Maui? That was where I honeymooned with my wife in May-June 2005 (also where my son was conceived....no rest for the wicked, apparently).

Thank you.

Originally Posted by HomeInMyShoes

The US Election. Talk about dragging on and destroying everything.

That is how all politicians are. Instead of governing, their reelection campaign begins the day after they win.

[Proof Sheet]

Originally Posted by niwell

Hang out at the resort / beach type,

Ah, the dreaded (for me) bubble vacation. I've never actually been to an all inclusive resort place. Being on a cruise in the Caribbean 20 + years ago was enough for me as I felt we were funneled to all the tourist traps and hawkers on the islands and never got to get off the beaten track.

I prefer exploring the countryside, hiking, walking, trying new foods, new people vacation. A week on a beech just sunbathing and all that and I'd need another vacation I remember going to Spain a few years ago and after about 3 days on the beach, I took the rental car and explored the hills etc nearby and ended up having lunch and beer with a UK ex pat family fixing up a ruin in a town nearby and hearing their woes of doing it and not knowing basically any Spanish (duh, not the smartest move). After two pints I had to have a nap in the car before I continued my drive.

[Nashe]

Originally Posted by MolsonExport

Good stuff. I have visited Oahu on previous occasions (I know Honolulu well, and I much prefer the north and Windward coast of Oahu to Waikiki) and I spent 9 days on the the Big Island on another trip (saw everything, went everywhere). We spent 13 days in Maui for our honeymoon (Based in a Ka'anapoli beach hotel), and we did everything that there is to do there (Haleakala at dawn, road to Hana, every beach, Iwo needle, tons of snorkeling [we got very lucky and swam with about 100 spinner dolphins for a couple of hours], Molokini, etc., etc.) I have also been to Lanai, but not to Kauai...which is at the top of my list. We are planning another Hawaii trip, but this time with the kids. I hope to combine it with an academic conference (there are usually 1-2 every year somewhere in Hawaii that are strongly connected to my primary research stream).

We've been to Hawaii several times over about 8 years: Oahu, Maui, Kauai, Maui/Lanai, Big Island. All islands have their pros... Oahu=history and little bit of everything, Maui=beaches, Big Island=volcanos but Kauai is hands down the prettiest, in my opinion. The green/black/white/blue theme is eye-stabbingly gorgeous.

[TorontoDrew]

I hate sidewalk bike riders.

[Nashe]

Originally Posted by TorontoDrew

I hate sidewalk bike riders.

Ugh, me too. Add to that people who walk three across, blocking the sidewalk or worse, dual-use path.

[TorontoDrew]

Ya F them. And more so right now. Make room for people to pass and keep distance.

[Doug]

2020 has reinforced my mounting misanthropy through suspicions that too many people:
-expect others to solve their problems
-are too eager to scam governments and employers
-carry too much personal debt to handle black swans
-are overly concerned with what other people are doing (like wearing masks)
-fail to challenge the assertions of leaders

Maybe I've been listening to too much Roger Waters era Pink Floyd


-