Did you grow up in and/or are you raising a family in urban multi-family housing?

[Steely Dan]

This is a tangent thread from the most populous city in the future thread.

Molson's post in that thread got me thinking:

Originally Posted by MolsonExport

You ungrateful little brat! Just look at everything you have. When I was your age, we... lived in a duplex! We didn't even have our own house!




there is no other line in this movie (American Beauty) that speaks to Carolyn Burnham's shallow, materialistic personality, than this one.

I myself was raised in a detached SFH in an upper middle class burb of chicago. But now I'm raising my family in a chicago 3-flat in a city neighborhood.

Though molson's post was tongue in cheek, it did get me wondering, will my kids look back on their own childhoods as something "less than" because they didn't get the stereotypical american SFH home experience?

Our condo is valued at many hundreds of thousands of dollars, so our kids are by no means growing up poor or deprived, but might they still develop some lingering sense of it not being enough?


What about those of you who grew up in urban multi-family housing? Have you ever looked back on it as "less than"? Has it ever factored into your own housing decisions as an adult? Did it impact where you decided/will decide to raise a family of your own?

[xzmattzx]

No, but I lived in a duplex in college. That's about it. My off-campus duplex was built as factory housing, actually.

I actually don't know if any of my ancestors have ever lived in urban multi-family housing. On my mom's side, my mom grew up in the suburbs, and my grandparents lived in the same house in the suburbs for over 60 years. When my grandfather worked for DuPont and they moved around everywhere, they usually had small single-family houses, since he was an engineer and worked in rural areas on pipelines. My maternal grandparents themselves grew up in single-family homes, one in the city and the other in a streetcar suburb. So my great-grandparents had single family houses.

On my dad's side, my dad and all of my ancestors lived in rural Pennsylvania, so they seemingly had single-family homes. That apparently goes all the way up the line from when the first ancestor emigrated in the late 1700s. My paternal grandparents lived in the same house for 60 years, where my dad grew up.

My sister is living in an apartment in Upper Manhattan right now, and another sister is living in a rowhouse in New Castle.

[SIGSEGV]

Age 0-5 literal commie block in București
5-8 graduate student family housing (worse than the commie block in a lot of ways)
8-9 townhouse
9-12 garden apartments
12-18 SFH
18-22 undergrad dorms
22-24 graduate dorms
24-26 townhouse
26-28 graduate family housing
28-now highrise


No kids yet but we're starting to try for one. We're about to close on a 2br condo in a high-rise in the loop.

[benp]

Originally Posted by Steely Dan

This is a tangent thread from the most populous city in the future thread.

Molson's post in that thread got me thinking:




I myself was raised in a detached SFH in an upper middle class burb of chicago. But now I'm raising my family in a chicago 3-flat in a city neighborhood.

Though molson's post was tongue in cheek, it did get me wondering, will my kids look back on their own childhoods as something "less than" because they didn't get the stereotypical american SFH home experience?

Our condo is valued at many hundreds of thousands of dollars, so our kids are by no means growing up poor or deprived, but might they still develop some lingering sense of it not being enough?


What about those of you who grew up in urban multi-family housing? Have you ever looked back on it as "less than"? Has it ever factored into your own housing decisions as an adult? Did it impact where you decided/will decide to raise a family of your own?

I was raised in the lower of a Buffalo Double with 3 other siblings, and my grandmother and uncle lived in the upper, as did my mother when she was younger. Our neighborhood is probably 60-75% doubles, triples, 4-plexes, or apartments.

Less than? Nope. Half the kids I knew until high school lived the same way, and the other half were in singles not much bigger than one unit of our double. I had to share a small room with my brothers, but so did the kids in single family homes as families were larger then. Maybe a bigger yard would have been nice to have, but that's about it. I went to high school with a mix of city and suburban, but mostly suburban kids, and I really never cared much about how or where they lived, but I did think that where I lived was "cooler" than their neighborhoods.

After I left home I lived in apartments until we could afford a home, but the city I moved to had very few multi-family homes, and the ones that existed were usually much more expensive. So, the idea of living in one again never came up until years later when we decided to move back to Buffalo.

Today I am back in the upper of a Buffalo Double, which we have updated and expanded into the attic, and another family member lives in the lower unit. Some of my in-laws have recently moved here from out-of-state with their two kids and are renting an upper unit nearby. They are in the market to purchase a double or triple, and plan to move their grandma into one of the units. They think that the doubles here are the greatest thing ever, and their kids are very happy to be here.

It may have been different for us if we were renting, or shared the house with strangers. But having a double either filled with family, or available for visiting family, was/is a great way to live.

[araman0]

Originally Posted by Steely Dan

This is a tangent thread from the most populous city in the future thread.

Molson's post in that thread got me thinking:




I myself was raised in a detached SFH in an upper middle class burb of chicago. But now I'm raising my family in a chicago 3-flat in a city neighborhood.

Though molson's post was tongue in cheek, it did get me wondering, will my kids look back on their own childhoods as something "less than" because they didn't get the stereotypical american SFH home experience?

Our condo is valued at many hundreds of thousands of dollars, so our kids are by no means growing up poor or deprived, but might they still develop some lingering sense of it not being enough?


What about those of you who grew up in urban multi-family housing? Have you ever looked back on it as "less than"? Has it ever factored into your own housing decisions as an adult? Did it impact where you decided/will decide to raise a family of your own?

Until very recently we were raising our kids in a Seattle townhome. They were just fine with it. We recently moved a mile away to a Seattle sfh, and the 8 year old actually wanted to stay in the townhome because it was 3 stories. You never ever can predict how kids think, even your own sometimes.

[sopas ej]

For me...

When I was born, my family was living in an apartment. When I was a year old, we moved to another apartment. When I was 2, we moved to another apartment. When I was 4, my parents bought their first house, single-family home. When I was 7, they bought a bigger house. When I was 8, they bought an even bigger house, the one they've been living in ever since, and where my sister and I grew up.

I lived in a dorm my freshman year in college at UC Santa Barbara. Hated it there. Transferred out and went to Cal State Long Beach, commuting to school from my parents' house. Lived there for a bit after graduation, and then met my partner, and then we moved in together into the apartment we've been living in ever since.

My parents are both from the Philippines; my mom grew up in the single-family house that her father built himself (he was a carpenter and furniture maker). My dad grew up on his family's ancestral farm, which his family still has.

[LA21st]

I grew up in a townhouse subdivision next to other townhouse subdivisions. A few condo/apartments in between. But mostly townhouses.

Typical for the area, middle class.

https://www.google.com/maps/@38.9366...7i13312!8i6656

[The North One]

I think most Millennials today resent their parents for forcing them to grow up in middle-of-nowhere soulless exurban sprawl where they were literally trapped in cul de sacs without a parent driving them somewhere until most of them were in their late teens or even twenties.

You got nothing to worry about, unless there's like no room in your house lol.

[LA21st]

I took the metro into Arlington/DC often. Fairfax County is nice for kids, but once you're 13 or so, you really do wish you were somewhere more interesting. By the time I was 17, couldn't wait to leave suburbia/Fairfax. After recent visits, point stands. It's the same place. Probably always will be.

[JManc]

I lived in both SFH and apartments growing up in NY and Houston and lived in various apartments as an adult until my 40's where i live in my own house in the suburbs. I'd prefer living closer in but also prefer a SFH which means $$$.

[pj3000]

Yes, my early years were spent in the upper unit of an up-and-down duplex which my parents rented in a 1920s urban neighborhood composed of a mix of duplexes and SFHs.

But we then moved to a SFH about 4 blocks away, which my parents purchased. And then we moved to a SFH in a more sought-after neighborhood, a 1920s-1950s mix of houses large and small in an early suburban-ish area.

Live in a single family homes now in Pittsburgh and Miami, but not currently raising a family in either.

[Pedestrian]

Originally Posted by Steely Dan

Molson's post in that thread got me thinking:

I myself was raised in a detached SFH in an upper middle class burb of chicago. But now I'm raising my family in a chicago 3-flat in a city neighborhood.

Though molson's post was tongue in cheek, it did get me wondering, will my kids look back on their own childhoods as something "less than" because they didn't get the stereotypical american SFH home experience?

Our condo is valued at many hundreds of thousands of dollars, so our kids are by no means growing up poor or deprived, but might they still develop some lingering sense of it not being enough?

What about those of you who grew up in urban multi-family housing? Have you ever looked back on it as "less than"? Has it ever factored into your own housing decisions as an adult? Did it impact where you decided/will decide to raise a family of your own?

Like many people in post-war America, my family lived in a series of apartment buildings during the 1940s which included the first 5 years of my life--until just before the turn of 1950 we moved to the suburbs and a single family house. I can vaguely remember those years and 2 memories are most prominent.

Both involve playing. The first has to do with the fact that there was nowhere I could go outside to play as a toddler. Basically, I had to wait for my grandparents, who lived in the same building fortunately, to take me to a small park about a block away which was mostly hardscaped but where I could feed and chase the pigeons. The second has to do with the limited indoor space in our apartment for my sister and I to play without conflict (she was 2 years younger)--we both mostly played on the living room floor and I remember her knocking down my constructions out of blocks.

I don't have kids--never have had--but yes, if I did have them I would at least want someplace they could safely go outside to kick around a ball or amuse themselves, possibly a wading pool and the rest. And I would want enough space for each child to have his/her own room.

And finally, let's face it, there's the question of schools. Very few cities have school systems that are as good as suburban systems and most people I know raising kids in the city at least send them to Catholic school if not private school, a large expense.

I actually don't know what a "3-flat" is. Is that 3 bedrooms? If so it may be large enough although many even modest SFHs today have separate living and "family" rooms. Or is that 3 flats stacked in which case the ones on upper floors probably don't have their own access to any rear yard space that young children could use.

As to the value, unless you're in Trump's class (Barron reportedly had his own floor in Trump Tower), I'm not sure it matters too much. Tourists are warned to avoid the "danger" of this neighborhood of $2+ million homes in San Francisco (IMHO that's ridiculous but it happens--I heard it happen at a meeting where out-of-towners were involved) and I'm pretty sure any parents living in those homes don't let the kids run outside to play in the very busy streets like I ultimately did in quiet ones in suburbia:


https://www.google.com/search?rls=en...Ykjk9o_AQzVLSM

[Innsertnamehere]

I always lived in SFHs.. in a small town on the edge of the metro. I hated the lack of transit access, but the town was fairly compact (~30 min walk from end to end, and from where we lived I could walk almost anywhere in 20 mins or less), and I loved my bike, so I stayed relatively mobile. It was a town of about 10,000 though so anything like going to a mall or the movies required leaving town and with that required a car.. so it was limiting in that way.

As I went into high school I learned of the inter-regional bus that took you into the city, and started using that more.

I did get my license the day I turned 16 though.

I moved downtown after high school and lived there for 7 years.. then moved to Hamilton for a SFH in a more urban location than what I grew up in and to be closer to the wife's family. A bus with relatively frequent services is an 8 minute walk from my house which is a single seat ride to downtown, connects to a potential future LRT station, and a GO station that takes you to Toronto. I fully expect my kids to be more mobile than I was in this location.

Basically it looks like this:

0-18 - SFH in a small town
18-25 - apartment in downtown Toronto
25-now SFH in an inner suburb of a smaller metro


Reverse the small town and inner suburb thing and you basically get my parents.. grew up in a SFH in Scarborough, moved into the city in a small apartment for their 20's, moved out to a small town to a SFH after that. Now in a SFH in an outer ring suburb.

[suburbanite]

Grew up in a SFH near an old suburban downtown. I actually think it was great growing up until you feel the need to get out around 17-18, just in time to go to a bigger city for university. Other than greater independence in getting around by yourself pre-car, I'm not sure what amenities I would have appreciated at the time if we were in an inner-city neighbourhood. I was still able to walk 10 minutes to high school, we had big ravines and greenspaces to escape to as teenagers and do questionable things. The movie theatre, mall, etc. were still pretty accessible.

I don't regret my parents not locating closer to Downtown, but was definitely ready for the next thing after 17 years there.

[jd3189]

I was mainly raised in multi-family housing. From living in a SFH converted into a duplex in Queens, to living in a townhouse in WPB, I have rarely lived in a detached house. Even now, I live in a small car oriented apartment in the IE. If I ever live in a house again, I will probably be renting it with other people until I make enough to buy one without a mortgage.

Grandparents on my father's side grew up in North St. Louis multifamily housing back when it still existed and was predominantly German. My dad and his brothers grew up in a post-WW-2 South City 4-family and I spent much of my childhood there with my grandparents—some of my best memories. When my parents married they bought a small ranch in far South City and ultimately, along with everyone else, moved us to a cul de sac in the suburbs in the late 80s when I was 10. My mother's parents lived in multifamily until they eventually bought a historic, 2-story, single-family, red-brick second empire (built on top of a cemetery—used to be the caretaker's residence) in South City. Not sure about my great grandparents but I'm pretty sure they lived in city multifamily as well. My parents generation (boomers) were the first to really abandon the city in large numbers.

[MolsonExport]

age, dwelling
0-2 apartment (inner city/streetcar suburbs)
2-24 SFH (numerous cities, suburbs)
24-28 apartment (inner city, then streetcar suburbs)
28-29 SFH (suburb)
30-36 apartment (inner city)
36-50 (present) SFH (suburbs)

[Acajack]

As a baby and toddler I lived in apartments, motels (not as bad as it sounds) and row homes in various small to medium-sized cities and towns.

About a year before I started school we moved to an SFH in a close-in first ring suburban area, and I lived in SFHs for the rest of my time (moving further out progressively) when I lived with my parents.

As a young adult I lived in downtown apartments and even spent a fairly decent amount of time in youth hostels and even couch surfing in SFHs and apartments here and there. (Again, it was way more comfortable than it sounds. I was not even close to being homeless or a vagabond.)

Since I got married I've lived in SFHs only. Inner suburban. I had an SFH for quite a few years before I had kids. My kids have only ever lived in an SFH.

[MonkeyRonin]

Originally Posted by suburbanite

Grew up in a SFH near an old suburban downtown. I actually think it was great growing up until you feel the need to get out around 17-18, just in time to go to a bigger city for university. Other than greater independence in getting around by yourself pre-car, I'm not sure what amenities I would have appreciated at the time if we were in an inner-city neighbourhood.

I imagine it's the kind of thing that you don't miss until you have it. But as a teen I definitely appreciated having easy access to the clubs, concerts, shopping, and such that living in the city entailed. Though, not that I'd have been terribly deprived if I'd instead grew up in walkable suburban neighbourhood like yours either. On the other hand, auto-oriented outer suburbia would have been awful - from what I know of people who grew up in such environments, I feel like they missed out on a lot of the childhood/teenage experiences that I hold near and dear.

To answer the question: I grew up in an SFH in an outer urban/inner suburban neighbourhood (built in that sort of early-post war hybrid typology before we really figured out suburbs) and have no kids yet - but when I do they will most likely be raised in an apartment. A modest inner-city rowhouse would be preferable, but probably out of reach given Toronto's extreme housing costs. But given the choice between space or location to raise kids in - I'd still choose location.

That same SFH has now been (or rather, is currently in the process of being) converted into a duplex though, and my niece is growing up in the upstairs apartment. She'll still have her own bedroom, a backyard to play in, grandparents downstairs, and easy access to all of the city's amenities. Hardly a deprived childhood!

[the urban politician]

Originally Posted by The North One

I think most Millennials today resent their parents for forcing them to grow up in middle-of-nowhere soulless exurban sprawl where they were literally trapped in cul de sacs without a parent driving them somewhere until most of them were in their late teens or even twenties.

You got nothing to worry about, unless there's like no room in your house lol.

I think there is not a shred of evidence of this, other than "I'm on SSP and half the forumers here are die hard urbanists and will agree with me, so nanner nanner nanner!!"

Most Millennials today do not resent their parents for "forcing them to grow up in exurban sprawl"