[Pavlov]

This is a really great thread. Its a nice change from a lot of the discussion on SSP over the past number of years.

I have two sons: one just turned four years old and the other is ten months old. I just turned 45 (does the make me the latest bloomer so far in this thread?).

Fatherhood has been an incredible experience. In my youth, I fancied myself a globe-trotting intellectual/adventure-seeker. I looked down on parenthood as a sort of "opium for the masses" who lacked my sense of adventure. Suffice to say, I was utterly wrong (and a pompous ass).

My experience has been so rewarding. It truly changed the way I reflect back on my own life, my own childhood, and think ahead about my own mortality.

Like others, it has also been incredibly difficult. My wife and I both have very demanding, very stressful professional jobs. As we waited so long to have children, we're both at a point in our careers where we're expected to be at our peaks (in terms of performance and commitment). Juggling that with the incredible demands of raising two young children has been very difficult.

Also, our nearest family (my mother-in-law) lives 400 km away (and she isn't willing or able to babysit, even for short periods of time). My wife and I literally have had one "date night" in four years.

All of this pressure has contributed to (or exacerbated) certain relationship troubles. We've slowly grown out of love. We've discussed separation. Obviously, we both want to do what is best for our children and our family, but it is so hard to know what that is. We're working on it.

Anyway, thanks again for this thread. Now that I've moved away from my childhood home, my relationships with friends and families isn't the same as it was, so I don't have a lot of people to vent to. Venting to anonymous SSP forumers feels surprisingly good.